Why I Need To Wear Makeup

image source

I am not entirely sure how to approach this post. But, one thing I want to include is total honesty. I am always honest on my blog but I don't always expose myself so freely when it comes to personal matters. You could be sitting there wondering why I'm slightly stressing about talking about makeup - well, it's because for me, it's a bit bigger than that.

I think like most things makeup has its pressures linked with it. It seems like we struggle to go bare faced without having to explain why we haven't 'made any effort'. It's true that when I don't wear makeup, it will usually be within the confinements of my own home. Without it I feel a little bit naked. My body is dressed so why isn't my face? Hence, I generally avoid waltzing around with no makeup on my face. I don't really rock the, 'I woke up like this' kind of look. For starters, I am even paler than Queen Elizabeth I back in the days when powdering your face to near transparency was the fashion. Secondly, I get affected by the concerned faces that look my way as they think I'm ill or 'looking tired'. Peeps - this is my face, I'd love some acceptance when it comes to being 'au naturel'. Being a red head, I am naturally quiet pale - I'd like to think that I don't look insanely ghastly because of my complexion. I envy the handful of people who are so confident in their own, natural skin that they can take morning selfies. Being wholeheartedly comfortable with in my skin is something that I am still learning to do.

I come across as a confident person as I've been told by teachers, friends and family. I think that my participation in Drama activities really helped me with my confidence - starting from a young age, presenting myself to other people and just 'letting loose'. Acting is exposure but essentially you are hiding behind the character of another person. Acting taught me how to apply different aspects of a persona and apply them to my own life. I don't mean that I designed my personality (creepy), but with every character I played, I learnt a little something about 'coping', life and what makes someone the person they are. Confidence was one of the things that I learned to apply and develop along with my acting. However, I've always been a mixture of confident and shy. I was at my worst when I was in High School (ages eleven through to fifteen) - never quite getting the balance and overall, being reserved and shy as I experienced changes (hello adolescence).

I suffered with spots, like most teenagers, but mine only seemed to get worse. This is when my interest in makeup really excelled. I wanted to use it to hide my hormonal skin. I think that this can be one of the beauties and flaws of makeup. I never had 'acne' per say, but my skin also went through a really 'rough patch'. I slapped on more and more makeup along the way. Thankfully, my hormones became far more balanced as I waved goodbye to those awkward teenage phases. However, my confidence in my skin remained knocked. I still felt like I needed to be plastering on my 'face paint' to hide my ex-flaws. I took me a while to realise that I no longer needed to hide behind my foundation.

Recently, in hospital, although I was pretty conked out on intense pain medication - one of my worries was my appearance. Call me crazy but I was worried what the nurses and doctors thought about my 'bare face'. Could they see any marks? Did may face look red? - all they wanted was to check my pulse and do some observations. Obviously I was looking ill (no brainer), but a part of me was anxious about my extinct spots. I know it sounds a little bit paranoid but I felt like I needed my makeup - just to feel better. This is when I knew that hiding behind my makeup was a bit of a problem. I was scared of my own skin, despite the fact that it no longer had any major flaws. I was also taken aback when people complimented my skin. Were they being sarcastic?

I don't mean to be insensitive towards people who have serious 'acne'. I haven't ever had major, unshakable spots. So, I'm sorry if my worries seem petty or insignificant in comparisons to people who have worse skin experiences than mine. But, for me, my skin was a major problem growing up and caused my confidence to plummet. I felt an insane pressure to have perfect, glowing skin. I understood that no amount of makeup could achieve that for me. But, I just felt like makeup got me closer to the goal of 'the perfect skin'. Plus, a girl never forgets when a boy points out that her skin looks 'lumpy', pointing and laughing. Although it was many years ago, that comment still dances around in my head. It was the worst stage of my skin and my makeup wasn't hiding it enough. I went home and cried. Then, I punched my laptop keys furiously to find answers - my skin problems needed to go.

A near three years later after that google session, my skin is all clear. Whether it was down to my diet change, the addition of facial products or simply my hormones balancing out as I grew older - I finally had that 'perfect' skin that I'd always wanted. The problem was, I still wasn't confident enough to show it. Makeup had become such a major part of my life. Makeup was my safety harness, the stabilisers for my confidence. In addition, I enjoyed experimenting with my makeup looks. Watching YouTube tutorials and trying out some new routine was fun and I'd come to love it. However, I haven't ever used makeup to look like a different person. I am really bad at 'contouring' and making my 'nose look slimmer' or my 'eyes bigger'. Personally, I am content with my features - it was only my skin that I ever had confidence issues with.

Since coming out of hospital, however, I have worn makeup less and less. I've also started wearing no makeup around friends - something that I hadn't done since I first put foundation on my face and never turned back. No one really noticed my 'skin problems' or if they did they never commented (except for that insignificant boy). They never saw my skin as 'bad' and certainly not ever natural. Now they only see my skin with very few flaws (none of us are 'flawless' unless we are Beyonce - hey Queen Bee). I get comments about how radiant my skin looks makeup-free and how I look no different without makeup. These comments give my confidence a major boost - especially because the comments are unprovoked. They knew nothing about my skin problems in the past, so I knew they weren't complimenting me to make me feel better.

Giving up makeup for a few months wasn't a choice that I made. Being ill forced me to worry about my wellbeing rather than my appearance. I am not self-obsessed, I promise, but I do like to look 'presentable'. Makeup makes me feel more ready for my day. It makes me feel more fresh and less like a Seuss character. But, taking a break from makeup was probably one of the healthiest things that I have done for myself this year.

I think that makeup is awesome. It makes women feel better - giving them a boost of confidence as they have fun with their outfits, hair and makeup (generalisation, I'm aware). But sometimes, women also hate makeup and the pressures of appearance we're put under. Please can we be allowed to look a bit like 'Hagrid' without being shunned? I really don't know how Kim K can be arsed having her 'beauty squad' fussing around her hours before she's exposed to the fresh air.

I depended on makeup to make me feel better, look better and to shake off any insecurities for the time that I had it on. Taking a break from my 'mask' meant that I could really come to love my face with and without makeup. Plus, I suppose I don't look that different, it's still my face! Yes my eyebrows are less prominent and my lashes lack a bit of volume but those are problems of a ginger with fine hair. As far as my skin's concerned - it's nearly glowing.

For years I felt compelled to slap on makeup. For years I missed out on an hour and a half's sleep as I woke up early before school to look the best I could. But now, as 2016 approaches, I hope to greet the years that I can be bare faced in and still be confident. People wear makeup for all sorts of reasons. Thankfully I can say that I no longer wear makeup to hide my skin insecurities - I wear it because I love it. However, I am really glad that my relationship with makeup was 'on a break' for a couple of months. My skin was left to breathe and my confidence was left to grow. I would never have chosen to take a break from makeup if it hadn't been for getting ill. Everything happens for a reason and although I'd like to think that my confidence would have increased gradually and naturally going 'makeup-less', I'm not too convinced. 2015, you have been tough for a copious amount of reasons. But I've learnt to love my skin wholeheartedly and shake off my old, longstanding perceptions of my face. People change, people grow and so do your attitudes and your perception of yourself and others.  I know that vanity isn't everything, but, I'd be lying if I said that I didn't care about my own.

One of the major things that I learnt last year?  Be comfortable in your own skin. Accept your imperfections and learn from them. And it's ok to put down the makeup brush. 

♥

This Elf Shopped Online This Year...

To clarify, I have been one of 'Santa's little helpers' for a few years now. I'm not going to deny it - when the season is in full swing, so is the stress hormone. There are many Elves like me rushing around at this time of year. Some get their jobs done far sooner than December - these Elves have my utmost admiration; my Elf hat goes off to you, my friend. However, the majority of us are a little bit unorganised, leaving all festivities and planning until the month of December. There's a part of me that thinks Christmas wouldn't be Christmas without the mad 'pressie' dash. Where's the fun in a super organised, structured Christmas? Christmas is supposed to have its 'moments' - just like life. But when it's Christmas, everything will be okay in the end - even if you end up with burnt turkey (what are processed turkey slices for, eh?). That being said, this Christmas Elf wanted a fairly relaxing Christmas, but there was nothing worse than the thought of joining the 'Christmas crowds' in a shopping centre. I thought that I'd take a leaf out of mother's book this year when I decided to do all my Christmas shopping online. Was it less stressful? Absolutely not.

There are pros and cons to every experience and there are definitely pros and cons in the development of technology. It is absolutely top notch that we can stay connected all the time with friends. It's also absolutely fabulous that we can spy on people who are miles away with their constant feeds of pictures and tweets. It's also too good to be true that you can shop thousands of products all while sitting on your derrière. No longer do we have to be brave and face the crowds of Christmas past. Goodbye are the days where we're forced to stare at fleeced shelves post Christmas dash. We can say farewell to the gym work out that we didn't sign up for because F.Y.I, hauling heavy shopping bags from shop to shop is certainly harder than it looks. And yes, we can also avoid the surging panic we feel when we hand over swarms of cash and then find our purses to be empty - we can just click and forget. Yes, there is no denying that by avoiding these factors the experience would be more enjoyable. Hence, shopping online becomes more of an appealing method for purchasing gifts. In fact, when it comes to Christmas shopping, it almost feels a little too easy. I was tracking down my presents in seconds as I typed at lightening speed into the google search bar, clicked on the item, added it to my basket, proceeded and BAM - purchase was complete. I almost felt enlightened. A few days later, 'Knock, knock' - 'who's there?' Why it was Santa Claus of course (a.k.a - Postman Pat).

But obviously, there's a spanner in the works to be found with the whole process. Shopping online made me feel a bit deflated. Christmas shopping is supposed to be a 3D experience. I want to see the shops decked out with tinsel, baubles and it's a bonus if the store has a tree. The sightings of frantic shoppers remind me I'm not alone. I want us to all dash together around the store. I want the ''Hunger Games' are about to begin'' moment as we dive for the last Christmas box set in sync. I want to hear Christmas songs on a loop, irritating me while also bringing music to my ears. I want to wait in the queue, glance down and savour the moments of admiration at the fantastic gifts I've just selected as they beam in my basket. There isn't so much as a Christmas jingle after making a Christmas purchase online. Instead, I just have a headache from the glare of the screen and find myself in recovery after being assaulted by a massive 'THANK YOU FOR YOUR ORDER' message once again. Shopping online didn't give me any festive experience - I just got to know my postman very well.

Shopping for Christmas gifts online was also very overwhelming. Pop-ups of 'the world's greatest socks' flashed in my face and I felt like I needed to buy them. Temptations were high and before I knew it, I'd signed up to buy a litter of tigers from Africa. I also battled with delivery charges - they made me question my whole purchase. £4.99 for standard delivery? I felt like I may as well have bought the delivery vans. Sure, I have saved some time in my day by doing my shopping online in one way. I haven't had to hunt the shops head to toe for the products I wanted. I also haven't needed to even tie my shoe lace and move any muscles other than my hands (only manoeuvring around the keyboard, mouse and my snack bowl). However, I completely forgot about all the days that I would need to hideaway in my house waiting for the postman to deliver my vast amount of orders.

If I was lucky, an email would send me a chirpy message telling me exactly when my package would arrive. The majority, however, were elusive and liked to keep me on my toes. Would I be able to shower or would the delivery man decide that it was an apt time to deliver the goods? I was living in suspense and I can tell you now, the whole experience put me a little on edge. I was the creepy girl who never got dressed. I peeped though my blinds spying on any potential vans that might host the man that would deliver my much anticipated parcels. The 'small talk' involved was also painful - 'Delivering many parcels today?' I'd sing - obviously, it was his occupation. A memorable chat was when one of them thought I was ill - can a girl not wear her polar bear dressing gown with no makeup without being questioned?!

I can safely say that I am happy that all parcels have arrived. While I'm not best pleased that one was lost along the way and will be a belated Christmas gift, on the whole, my online shopping was successful. However, what I didn't realise was that I missed the 'real life' Christmas shopping experience. I like playing 'dodge 'em' with the other customers as we weave around each other grabbing gifts from the shelves. I also miss being handed my purchased items in a Christmassy bag and a 'Merry Christmas' wish from the employees. But what I missed the most were the Christmas decked shops - I really could've done with seeing a Christmas light this year.... Hey ho - an Elf has got to live and learn, right? All I know is that if I see another cardboard box addressed to me - next time, it better be from Santa and not from my credit card.

♥

Hair Crushes of 2015

all photos from Pinterest

Hailey Baldwin 

(top left) 

The fact that Hailey Baldwin is my age and looks so incredibly I-N-S-A-N-E, is a little bit unfair. I have been seriously obsessing over her latest hair look - lapping up those bangs. I think the return of the 'bangs' or the fringe in 2015 was super positive and when my hair grows a little longer, I fully intend to try it out myself. The look is risky because you have to take into consideration facial structure and the maintenance of the pesky fringe. However, I am ready to return to my roots and introduce the fringe back to my face in 2016. I owe it to Hailey for encouraging me with her Instagram posts and showing me that the fringe isn't something you should always keep in the past..wish me luck! 

 Jessica Woodley 

(bottom left) 

Some of you might not be aware of who Jessica Woodley is, so let me tell you. Jess is a well known 'Made in Chelsea' reality star - well known for not only her personality on the show but also her to-die-for-style. I know this is another mid-length cut with 'bangs' but I cannot get enough of this look. Jess's hair has definitely been one of my major hair crushes of 2015. She pulls off this look with effortless ease. Jess has a blunter finish to her bangs compared to Hailey or Kendall, but nevertheless this look is uh-mazing. 

 Kendall Jenner 

(center - but y'all already know K Jenner) 

Can we all just take a moment to appreciate Kendall Jenner's temporary but oh so awesome new look here. Kendall needs no introduction - a member of the 'Kardashian' clan, her name is known to almost every household on the planet. More than just a Kardashian, Kendall has made a name for herself in the fashion industry and is a super successful model in her own right. When I'm not obsessing over Kendall's catwalk looks, I am definitely stalking her own personal style. I am in LOVE with this look of Kendall's and I have to say I think it is one of my favourites of all time. I love the slightly long bangs and the longer side pieces that finish the fringe off nicely down the sides of her face - creating a mini frame to those fierce eyes of hers. 

 Lily Rose Depp 

(top right) 

I am certainly not brave enough to have this super short bob that Lily Rose Depp has here, but my appreciation for her daring look falls off the scale. Lily Rose Depp is gorgeous - can we expect anything less from a descendant of Johnny Depp himself? Blessed with those genes, Lily can pull off this short bob with class, sophistication and high fashion infused energy. Lily's style is amazing and is a definite style crush head to toe.

 Emma Stone 

(bottom right)

Emma Stone's red tresses make me really happy - team redheads. Emma dyes her hair frequently, sometimes venturing into blonde territory. However, I think this is one of my favourite looks, not only on her, but of 2015. I love the bob and the side swept fringe combined with the warmth of red. Currently trying to grow out my own hair for it to return to its natural red state, I get inspired by women like Emma who pull off the colour so well! 

Review / Estee Lauder Double Wear Foundation

One of my most read posts is my Max Factor Whipped Cream Foundation. When I wrote this post I had no intention of it becoming a popular post. At the time I was mostly focused on writing fashion posts and beauty was only something that I'd dipped into at times where I was really loving a product and wanted to share my views. Max Factor Whipped Cream Foundation remained my go-to foundation for a few years after the post was written. However, my skin type has changed from when I wrote that review and I find the foundation far too masking and thick for the current state of my skin. This drastic change in my foundation needs just goes to show how individual an experience with a product is. So, while reading this review, please bear in mind your skin type may be different and you may have a completely different experience when trying out the exact same foundation as me.

I tried a few High Street foundations before I splashed out on Estee Lauder's expensive but renowned Double Wear Foundation. Priced at £30 for 30ml of product, you are paying £1 per 1ml of foundation. It is hard to justify really throwing your money at a new product, sceptical as to whether it will be perfect for you and worth that £1 per ml. The fact that the foundation has SPF 10 earned it extra brownie points (however, most foundations tend to protect the skin from those pesky sunrays anyhow.). Anyway, ponderings aside, I bought the foundation one day and I do not have many regrets. The reason I say I do not have 'many regrets' is because I wish I had scavenged the shelves of my local Boots a little more thoroughly.  I have since found a High Street foundation that costs me nearly a quarter of the price of Estee Lauder's Double Wear Foundation. I will, without question, be doing a blog post featuring this adored High Street foundation. However, for now, on with the Estee Lauder Foundation review I set out to write!

The coverage of the foundation, is without a doubt the best I have come across. The claims that the foundation 'stays is place' and the premiss of its name tells no lies. 'Double Wear' lasts the best out of any foundation I have ever plastered on my face. After withstanding thunderous rain, ghastly wind and the frightening frost of UK weather, at bedtime the foundation smugly remains intact. I wore the foundation daily throughout the course of Summer and if there's one thing that I would note about the foundation it is that I think it is definitely suited better for Winter. During Summer, I found the foundation too masking - its coverage far greater than I needed during the Summer months. While I had absolutely no experience with the foundation causing breakouts, my friend had to stop using the product as she discovered it had caused areas of her face to flare up with spots. Like I mentioned above, a relationship with foundation is personal and skin complexion plays a role in what foundation is best for you. My skin type is typically quite oily - at the end of the day I look almost as reflective as tin foil. However, this is no fault of the products I wear on my face. In fact, if anything, the foundation sets my powder in place preventing the oil from sliding into action.

The foundation is a bit of a pest once accidentally smudged onto necklines of clothes - it takes its role seriously and wants to stick to its surface. In addition, ensure you wash your face thoroughly and cleanse to get all the product off because remnants of the foundation on your skin will cause irritation and most likely lead to a spot developing. Dubbed the 'holy grail' of all foundations, Double Wear certainly is one of the best foundations to buy for purposes of long-lasting coverage. I wish I had come across the foundation in my teenage years when spots were almost as shameful as running through the street naked. The foundation has a natural-looking glow to its finish and works well with other products applied on top such as blushers, powders and bronzers. Surprisingly, the foundation does not leave your face feeling greasy despite its slightly oily, liquid consistency straight out of the bottle.

Overall, if you are looking for a foundation that covers well, lasts all day and looks au naturel - Double Wear is the foundation for you. However, if you want a foundation that isn't super covering and masking your natural skin - this is not the foundation you necessarily want to splash out on. I found the foundation perfect for me on days that I'm not going near my makeup bag for touch-ups and it is awesome for nights out. I definitely prefer wearing the foundation during these wintery months, as like I mentioned above, during Summer I found the coverage too intense and I wanted my natural skin to see some Vitamin D.

10 Signs You're Ready To Cut Your Hair

photo source: Pinterest

1. You just can't stand the sight of your hair any longer.

2. You never get creative with up-do's or any form of plait (french plaits are so out of the question).

3. You've had long hair for as long as you can remember.

4. You're obsessed with short hair. You love the look of it so much you've even got photo albums of inspiration.

5. You have absolutely no enjoyment brushing those long locks - the mane is too hard to tame. 

6. You need to undergo a serious life change - cutting your hair is the first step of the transformation process. 

7. You can't remember the last time you looked in the mirror and adored the sight of your long hair. 

8. Your hair's in bad condition anyway - cutting those dead ends off will give it a new lease of life. 

9. Your favourite Disney Princess is Rapunzel from Tangled - she rocks short hair even better than Snow White. 

10. You've been debating cutting your hair for weeks/months/years - it's time to bite the bullet.

Disclaimer: If you've followed the advice from this post - I am not held responsible for any bad haircuts and will not be blamed for any regretful decisions. However, if there's one thing I know for sure, I have absolutely no regrets in going for the ol' chop and would seriously recommend it. 

TTFN. 

Review / Lush Henna Hair Dye & My Hair Journey...

'NEVER dye your hair'. 

This was a sentence that was said to me by friends, adults and strangers that I'd just met. My natural hair colour is ginger. Growing up I had absolutely no shame in the fact that I was a class A 'ginger'. In fact it was my trademark - I loved it. Oh, and just in case you were wondering - yes, gingers do have souls.

Dying my hair was something that I'd always been adamantly against. People always complimented my hair colour, saying that they loved the caramel/ginger tone of my hair. I once got approached when I was about fourteen years old by a thirty-something woman begging me to tell her what hair dye I used. I was fourteen and she was selling me my favourite cake (I was in my local bakery). My first thought was please hand me my cake and no one gets hurt, as I'd exchanged my money for my cake. Naturally, I wanted my cake not questions. My second thought was - lady, this is 'au naturel'. My third thought - 'I'm only fourteen and I'm not supposed to talk to strangers'....
After getting my cake finally, I told her that it was my natural hair colour. Bemused and getting a closer look, the staring was getting rather awkward - not to mention that I still wanted to stuff my face with the cake I now held. 'Well, don't dye it darling because I would pay hundreds for that colour'. With a 'thanks' and an awkward shuffle out of the shop, I indulged in my cake which disappeared somewhat five seconds after my exchange with the woman who had sold me it.

I don't know if it was the fact that I was seventeen and craved a change or if I was sick of being told to never dye my hair (I've never been good at being told what I can or cannot do) - but I did it. To clarify, the 'it' that I did was dye my hair. I decided this impulsively in October 2014 when I looked at my hair in the mirror and needed a change. I grabbed the Lush Henna block that I had randomly stored in my kitchen cupboard (my Mum previously being a Henna user) and melted it down and spread the dye all over my hair.

Why I chose Lush Henna Dye 

Aside from the fact that it was the only hair dye that I could get from within my house during impulse decision time, I chose Henna dye for its nourishing benefits. Whether you're dying your hair with chemicals from a box or having them professionally applied at the hairdressers, chemicals will not leave your hair in good condition. The last thing that I wanted to achieve was hair in worse condition than mine already was at that stage in my life. I had grown my hair out and styled it to the point that it was literally burning off. I applied heat to my hair every day without fail and didn't deep condition it ever. I'd since learned the error of my ways and wanted a hair dye that would nourish, condition and colour! I've also got super sensitive skin so the last thing that I needed was a chemical reaction achieved from a cheap chemical hair dye found in a box!

Henna hair dye coats your hair. Synthetic hair dye and other colour treatments open your hair cuticles and penetrate your hair with colour and (hate to state the obvious) chemicals. These chemicals also enter your skin, bloodstream and system. Henna dye simply stains the outer layer of your hair. I didn't want any chemicals entering my bloodstream, thank you :) . Lush Henna dyes have a great reputation, renowned for their natural ingredients!

What is Lush Henna?

When I told people that I had dyed my hair with Henna they thought I'd gone insane - 'What, the thing you use to make patterns on your arms?'. Henna is a plant that is natively found in the Middle East and it can be used to dye skin and hair. The Henna plant leaves are dried and then ground into a powder which is then mixed with cocoa butter and made into a solid brick ready to buy. The tricky part is choosing what colour combination that you want to use because there are four different shades and tones created by - Brun, Noir, Rouge and Marron.

Choosing my colour

I would like to say that my hair dying process had some sort of method to it but honestly it was very spontaneous and very random. I used different combinations and quantities of Rouge and Marron to begin with and then became daring adding less Rouge and venturing into Brun and Noir. The process of dying my hair with the solid Henna blocks was very tedious. It's probably my lack of patience with time consuming beauty things like this, but I found melting the Henna blocks down until they were liquid laborious work! After various methods that I tried (one of which included a cheese grater but let's not get into that..), smashing the solid blocks up into pieces and individually melting them in a saucepan proved to be the most successful. Applying it was the next nightmare. This dye stains, which is good really because that is what you've paid for it to do, but staining anything other than your hair is just annoying. Once you've covered your hair surface with the dye, you've got to be like a little ninja around your home, henna-proofing every fabric surface to avoid brown/yellow staining from the dye. I chose to let my hair dye in the open air (the process can take up to 2-3 hours), which meant I basically had to sit on my floor and wait because small flakes of the henna flew off as it dried! This was a nightmare but I dyed my hair at least seven times with the stuff so I had become somewhat a pro towards the end!

I would like to say that I kept a record of the exact colour combinations I used and how long I left the dye on and all my process stages but I didn't. Admittedly I was hesitant to create this post because I changed my hair colour with Henna for two months non-stop, trying out different combinations. Therefore, there's not a lot in terms of information and advice on how you achieve a specific shade. However, I took a few different pictures along the way to give you an idea of what colours you can achieve from using the Lush Henna blocks.

Unfortunately these are all in the forms of selfies. Please, do not judge me in these selfies. I haven't uploaded them too show off - I have uploaded them to show the colour change. If I had the technical skill, I would blur my face off to resemble a potato head with hair to avoid judgements but here's my face because I don't have that skill.

     

The initial change was achieved with mostly the use of Rouge and red wine to enhance red tones here. Like I said, I didn't keep a record of what colours I used and how much of what I used unfortunately! This colour was a little too orange-toned for me and while there's nothing wrong with a fiery tone, it wasn't what I was looking for so I kept experimenting! 

I started adding more of Brun to the mixture, I think this was my favourite shade that I achieved but typical to the nature of Henna the colour started fading so I re-dyed!

      

Then a small disaster happened and I accidentally went brown. On my Henna adventure I never ever intended to be anything other than a red head. The fact that I'd coated the red out of my hair really was upsetting. This was the point that I had become too experimental with my Henna dying and chose to stop for good. I wanted my red hair back and re-dying wasn't the answer because you cannot strip Henna hair colour out of your hair or achieve a lighter shade from a darker one - you simply have to grow it out. 

This is the colour of my faded Henna colour now. It is still a lot darker than my natural hair colour and not as red as I want it. After all my experimenting I decided that my natural hair colour was the one that I really loved. I am only comfortable being a 'ginger', nothing else. When I had brown hair, although I received many compliments, I also received many sad looks - 'Where has your red hair gone!'. It was a question I never thought that I would be asked. I love my red hair and I want it back. The Henna experiment was fun for a while but it was expensive, laborious and time consuming - not to mention unpredictable. I would recommend Henna for anyone who wants to dye their hair the healthy way but I would NOT recommend it for anyone who gets bored quickly because once you've dyed your hair with Henna there is no going back! You cannot use chemical hair dyes on top of Henna - you risk burning your hair off/ turning it green in some cases. The only way to get rid of your Henna stained colour is to grow it out. 

Here's to my continued journey - growing back my natural hair colour. Goodbye Henna, you were fun for two months. I am now eighteen years of age and I would like to think that I will stop making such spontaneous decisions. However, it's my spontaneous decisions that have led to outcomes such as this blog so who knows what's next! 

Visit the LUSH website for more details on Henna and advice.

(I am not a qualified Henna expert nor do I aspire to be, ergo the information in this blog post is derived from my personal experience and the information is not gospel!)

What's On My Wish Lists / May

In the midst of preparing for University and moving hundreds of miles away and preparing for my last ever exams, 'What's On My Wish Lists' for the month of April got accidentally overlooked. However, while the exams and University preparations are now actually even more prominent in my life, I can't bear to be parted with my blog any longer. So, here is my May wish list...

1. River Island Khaki Green Lightweight Textured T-Shirt £20.00 / 2. River Island Black and White Zip Front Top £32.00 / 3. River Island Grey Print Side Split Sleeveless Shirt £36.00 / 4. River Island Cream Fitted Biker Jacket £60.00 / 5. Topshop Petite Grid Print Bonded Midi Skirt £55.00 / 6. New Look White Leather Chunky Multi Strap Block Heels £39.99 / 7. Topshop Petite Asymmetric Dress £39.00

Recently, I have been trying to buy pieces that will make my wardrobe more diverse. I think that we are all guilty of sticking to the same things; whether this be always choosing your favourite chocolate frosted cupcake instead of that mysterious, untasted Victoria Sponge in your local cafe, or in my case, my clothing choices. I know a lot of people who talk about how they easily get stuck in a makeup routine, sticking with the same beauty products that they know and love. In one sense, what's wrong with that? But, one common complaint with this frame of mind is that these people who are fortunate enough to have found what they know and love are cutting off the possibilities of trying something new, and quite possibly a thousand times better. At this point I will stop talking about makeup. I am not a complete beauty enthusiast. Sure, I love my makeup and love experimenting with new looks but fashion is my forte and what I truly love. Therefore, I got to thinking about dressing and how this 'daily routine' doesn't solely apply to makeup products. Buying clothes is an investment, whether you look at it as one or not. When you exchange money for fabric you are in fact investing - surely you want that piece of clothing to look good for many years to come?

 After recently moving house and having to face the task of boxing up all my belongings, I revisited items of clothing that I hadn't seen or worn in a couple of years. These items were the failed investments. More often or not, these failed items were products of an impulse sale purchase that never came in contact with my skin after that initial grab off the sales rack. I also realised that a lot of my clothes were the same kinds of items - a guilty owner of one too many shirts, crop tops and skinny jeans. All these items reflected my high school persona that was subconsciously trying to fit in with the 'norm' of the teenage society. However, in dressing like this, I was in fact hiding who I was - afraid to make too much of a statement. The worst part was that my routine had become the same as the routine of many other teenage girls - blending their clothes in amongst their crowd along with their highly contoured cheeks. In recent months, I made the conscious decision to unmask my real personality and this meant buying clothes I actually wanted to buy - clothes that would express. 

In this month's  wish list I have chosen items that I feel are diverse, unique and that would be easily paired with multiple items that already exist in my wardrobe. My aim of 'dressing to express' (not impress) meant that I needed a bit of a wardrobe re-vamp.  I wanted these clothes to assist me into the  next chapter in my life - moving away and embracing the opportunity to study what I truly love - Fashion. So, unlike many of my previous, mediocre wish lists, this wish list marks an important point in my life. This wish list is more than a collage of clothes. It is a reflective display of who I actually am and who I plan to dress like - which, is no longer anyone else other than myself. 

So, if you're stuck in your same routine, why not try that piece of Victoria sponge and put down that chocolate frosted cupcake? 

February / What's On My Wish Lists

Firstly I am terribly sorry that my blogging habits have been subdued over the past two weeks - to say I've had a busy month would be an understatement! While university interviews and eighteenth birthday celebrations were filling the 'exciting' section of my diary, coursework deadlines and A-level work continued to takeover a vast chunk of the less riveting side of my life. But, I'm back and with a busy blogging schedule to follow!! 

1. Topshop Vintage Jeans by Boutique £55.00 - When I was younger jeans weren't one of my favourite pieces of clothing; I thought that they were stiff, rigid items that were mainstream. However, the 21st Century has given jeans a new lease of life and now they are bigger and better than ever before. With Hailey Baldwin recently fronting Topshop's new SS15 denim collection, denim is cooler than ever before. I love Topshop's new collection of denim and denim jeans are becoming one of my favourite pieces of day-today clothing. From 'mom' style jeans to ripped, barely-there pieces, I plan to accumulate quite a collection of denim for my Spring wardrobe! 

2. Topshop Petite Split Back Duster Coat £79.00 - I don't have a favourite colour which is deemed as odd by a few people. Personally my colour preferences change depending on my mood or the time in my life, for example my favourite colour is currently red - bold, daring and supposedly a colour of success. However, throughout the times, green is always a colour that I will find some form of comfort in. In fact, a lot of my clothing is green - whether it reminds me of nature's green grass, or Santa's Elves' outfits, green is always a colour that I am more than happy to drape over my body. Therefore, it will be no surprise to you that I am falling in love with this Topshop Split Back Duster Coat!! 

3. New Look Khaki Textured Pointed Court Shoes £19.99 - Heels are an essential for practically any girl's wardrobe. They are quite literally the 'pick me up' item that will elevate you into a happier sense of self, until you get to the crippling stages of agony after wearing them too long. These Textured Pointed Court Shoes from New Look would be perfect day-to-day wear for one of those days when a pick me up is needed. 

4. ASOS Open Triangle Cuff Bracelet £8.00 - Accessories - sometimes un-noticed and even worse, sometimes unaddressed. 2015 has been an amazing year so far - a year where I've decided to embrace anything and everything that comes my way; and that includes accessories! Stemming from my obsession with rings, I am now slowly becoming obsessed with bracelets also (save my soul). This Open Triangle Cuff Bracelet is cute and simple - not too eye-catching, for an outfit that doesn't need to be overpowered by jewellery! 

5. Ted Baker Patent Crosshatch Large Shopper £169.00 - Ted Baker can do no wrong, however, it can so easily tempt me to part with money, as with this gorgeous Shopper!! I think this bag is the perfect transitional seasons bag, introducing the lighter, pastel shades of S/S15 into your existing darker tones of A/W14 wardrobe.

6. Topshop Limbo Snake-effect Platform Sandals £52.00 - Perhaps a little ambitious for day-to-day wear here in Britain where rain can be seen exploding from the clouds, but some day soon these Snake-effect Platform Sandals will be the perfect partner for a S/S15 outfit.

7. New Look Camel Block Stripe Print Blanket Wrap £24.99 - When it comes to fashion there are some decisions (very rarely) where you have to consider the practicality of an item. This Blanket Wrap is definitely one of those items which has the benefit of being practical yet stylish, making it even more tempting to purchase it. Although we are supposedly nearing Spring and Summer, I can still feel the chilly Winter bite here in the UK - hand me this Blanket Wrap from New Look and a hot chocolate please because I'm turning into Olaf here! 

Valentines Day Gift Ideas

As Valentines Day approaches and boyfriends and girlfriends swan around looking for the perfect gift to make the beloved smile, there's only one thing that I'm thinking - Happy Birthday Gran! It just so happens that 14th February not only marks the much celebrated Valentines Day, it also is a very special day for my Gran - her birthday. So far, I am yet to celebrate Valentines Day with for its actual purpose. It's singles like me who try and forget about the romance of Valentines Day, remaining happily alone and independent eating a box of chocolates. I have never been phased by the idea of Valentines Day - for those who have partners great - enjoy the day and be happy as you celebrate your relationship. For the rest of us, carefree and single, enjoy your independence and celebrate that..you've got years ahead to worry about someone else and their problems and their needs - why be tied down? I've got a bit of single girl power here and with the lovey-dovey day approaching, I'm going to make the most of my freedom! 

It also occurred to me that Valentines Day is all about love - so yes, it's appropriate to buy gifts for your BF or GF, but why not plan a special day with your single friends? Uniting together, do a little gift sharing of your own with these Valentines Day Gift Ideas for your BFFL! Share a different kind of love for a friend who has been there for you longer than any other boy/girl partner! 

1.  ASOS.com A Pug's Guide To Dating Valentines Book £9.99 - Although I'm all for 'All The Single Ladies' putting their hands up, maybe a few dating tips wouldn't be unappreciated for your fellow single friend. What better adviser than an adorable Pug? 

2. Urban Outfitters Jar Candle in Bamboo Tea £15 - A candle to calm the nerves of any single friend who is desperate for a boyfriend. Throw this candle his/her way and they'll be calm and collected in no time. Better still, order a pizza and light the candle whilst watching anything starring Zac Efron!!

3. Urban Outfitters Emojibomb Disposable Camera £15 - Plan a day out with this old-school style Emojibomb Disposable Camera and snap some memorable photos for a Valentines Day worth remembering! 

4. Topshop Love Heart Stamper £7.50 - Stamp the love here, there and everywhere with this cute little Love Heart Stamper! 

5. ASOS.com Too Faced Sweethearts Perfect Blush £26 - Every girl likes makeup...every girl also likes heart shaped makeup...every girl likes heart shaped makeup given to her on Valentines Day. Why? Because it reminds her that makeup is her faithful one true love. 

6. Urban Outfitters Not That Kind of Girl Book £16.99 - A book for a girl written by a girl - females unite! 

7. Topshop Bear Picnic Blanket £25 - Plan a cute picnic date with your best mate and remind yourself that partners aren't the be-all and end-all of your younger years.  

8. Topshop Care Bear Mug £8 - Spread the care with this care bear mug! I love care bears, they're cute and by nature (although not on this china mug) are huggable and soft - comfort for the lonely on Valentines Day! 

9. Urban Outfitters Oh Deer Piss Off A5 Notebook £8 - Another approach to Valentines Day and being single is to change your attitude and turn that frown upside down with this inspirational, attitude filled notebook. Take a leaf from its front cover and tell Valentines Day where to go! 

ps: Sincere apologies to those of you reading this who are loved up and expected a blog post all about the beauty of love on Valentines Day..I wish you and your partner all the best and hope you have a tip-top day :)

LUSH Christmas Haul

IT'S CHRISTMASSSS! Well it was, two days ago.. Belated Merry Christmas everyone! There are two occasions in a person's annual calendar when it is absolutely necessary to do the following:-

1. Take a break
2. Treat yourself
3. Spend inordinate amounts of money and not feel too guilty about it
4. Indulge in chocolate, cake and delicious foods and not care when you see your waistline is expanding to about four times its size.

If you haven't guessed already, these two occasions are your birthday and, well, Christmas of course! I am buzzing with Christmas spirit this year - I practically counted down the seconds. This year, I planned on doing all the above - taking a break, treating myself, spending money and indulging myself in all the delicious Christmas delicacies - mince pies, Christmas puddings, turkey dinners and pigs-in-blankets galore! I am pleased to say that I have completed all of my Christmas targets above. Now, the Christmas festivities are coming to a close...or they are supposed to be. However, I wasn't ready to say goodbye to Christmas just yet. I had to come up with a plan to make Christmas last for a few more days at least - I wanted a LUSH Christmas. If you didn't get that Christmas-cracker style joke/pun on words, I'll rephrase myself...basically, I trotted down to LUSH and got my mitts on the most Christmassy themed products I could find - so I can smell like Christmas way past the deadline!

Snowman Fun 

Yog Nog soap

Melting Snowman

Creamy Candy

Drummers Drumming

Butterbear

Holly Go Lightly

Walking into the Lush shop is like walking into a prison cell..once you're in you're in and there's not a lot you can do to escape. I'm not exactly comparing the experience of being in my local LUSH store to a prison cell - partly because I haven't got any experience of being in a prison cell apart from what I've seen on Orange is the New Black - but in a metaphorical sense, LUSH's shop arrests you with its gorgeous smelling delicacies, tempting you so that seconds later the whole stock of the shop ends up in your over-stuffed basket of things to buy. Restraining myself, I decided to pick my favourite 7 items - whether or not you call that restrained, I'll let you decide. Tempted by their names, smell and oh-so amazing appearance, I picked up the Snowman Fun soap, Yog Nog soap, Melting Snowman, Creamy Candy bubble bar, Drummers Drumming bath stick, Butterbear bath bomb and the Holly Go Lightly bubble bar.

Of course I couldn't leave the shop without buying one of LUSH's most inventive and brilliant ideas ever - the Snowman Fun soap! At first, I picked this Snowman up not knowing what I'd just placed in my palms..thankfully with my glasses at the ready I read the fine print - 'make your very own snow people' - well OK then! I am super excited to try this Snowman Fun soap out! I can't wait to have a whole collection of little Snowmen (& snow women and snow dogs etc.) - the possibilities are endless.

I also thought that I should experiment a little so I was adventurous and picked up some new things, some of which I've heard bloggers rave about and others I'd never seen before! A definite must-have was the Yog Nog soap. As soon as I smelt this delicious soap I had to stop myself from taking a bite - it seriously smells that good. I've used this soap a couple of times and find myself close to licking the surface; it's like a cruel temptation to your nose - but a delightful one at that. Smelling a little bit like a toffee truffle, this soap not only smells good but is also really rehydrating. In the Winter season my hands usually get really dry but since using this soap my skin is feeling soft and nourished - it really is a bar of magic!

Last year I blogged about the LUSH products that I used around Christmas time - I loved so many of them last year and genuinely found them so nourishing for my skin, so, why not repurchase a few of them? A definite hit last year had to be the Melting Snowman. This product is uh-maz-ing, from its cute little melted appearance (and missing nose - sorry little fella, seems like it snapped off on the way home) to its chocolatey scented eyes and buttons - this snowman does not disappoint!

The Creamy Candy Bubble bar, I must confess, was probably not the most Christmassy item that I could've picked up but once I'd smelt this, there was no putting it down! I followed my nose (literally) to the till and bought it without a second thought. This Cream Candy Bubble Bar simply smells divine and I have no regrets. I love the Bubble Bars because they last well. You snap pieces off the Bubble Bar and crumble it under the running water to create your bubbles, usually turning your bath water a fabulous colour and filling the room with the delightful scents. Therefore, taking all of that into consideration, I cannot wait to try this Bubble Bar out.

A Christmas classic song is Twelve Days of Christmas. Therefore, I couldn't have picked up a more Christmassy item - Drummers Drumming. Although the song says that there are twelve drummers drumming, my budget said there was one. I love the way that this has little bells attached with two different coloured sides of the 'drum'. I can't wait to run this under the water and watch as bubbles develop!

The cute little Butterbear bath bomb was a must-have as soon as I saw it. To be honest, I saw its face and loved it from there on. I did the classical 'judging a book by its cover' sort of thing. But, this Butterbear shall not disappoint, because although I stuffed it into my basket without caring if it smelt nice or not (if it looks pretty, it could be an ornament, right?) - I have since smelt the delightful bear-faced specimen and it smells insanely good. Hooray for the Butterbear! 

Due to my name being Holly, being a fan of Breakfast At Tiffany's and Audrey Hepburn and Christmas Puddings and glitter - I couldn't exactly say no to this 'Holly Go Lightly' glittering bubble bar, could I? The glitter does go everywhere but I don't care because I think I've found one of my favourite Christmas LUSH products. Smelling amazing (obviously) and looking more Christmassy than my actual Christmas pudding - this product has got five stars from me!

So that's it for this year's LUSH Christmas haul - bring on next Christmas (I'm already excited).

To read last year's A LUSH Christmas Review - click here 

Christmas Essentials Wish List

1. ASOS - Pug Wrapping Tape £4.50  - Wrapping Christmas presents is not one of my favourite things to do. Drowning under a pile of paper with ribbons flying everywhere and sellotape clinging and sticking to me - I find the experience very un-enjoyable. My favourite part of the debacle is, in fact, looking at the end result. When I came across this Pug Wrapping Tape I thought it was the funniest and cutest thing ever. Although it isn't the most Christmassy of all wrapping decorations, it would definitely bring a smile to someone's face. Who wouldn't want to look at dancing pugs on Christmas?

2. Paperchase - Festive Food Red Hot Water Bottle £8.75 - I love this Festive Food Red Hot Water Bottle. There is nothing that I love more than drinking a cup of chocolate cocoa with whipped cream and marshmallows on top, snuggled in a cosy blanket with a hot water bottle on my lap and my little dogs by my side. I currently have a cow hot water bottle that doesn't have any Christmas spirit - replacing it with the Festive Food Red Hot Water Bottle would be the ultimate Christmas experience.

3. Paperchase - Fun Santa Egg Cup £7.00 - Breakfast accompanied by Santa is one of the best breakfasts you could ask for. I love this Fun Santa Egg Cup - have this as a pre-Christmas item to get into the ultimate Christmas mood!

4. ASOS - Christmas Pudding Lip Balm £3.00  - This would be the cutest thing to add to your makeup bag. Everyone experiences chapped lips during the Winter time and to avoid those un-attractive lips, smothering this Christmas Pudding Lip Balm all over them would not only be delicious but it would be Christmassy to the max!

5. Paperchase - Christmas Jumper Mug £8.50 - For those perfect snuggly evenings with a cup of hot chocolate in your hands, this Christmas Jumper Mug would be perfect to protect your hands from getting burnt and what's cuter than a Christmas accessorised mug?!

6. Paperchase - Festive Food Cupcake Cases £3.50  - Baking all things delicious and warm is part of the joy of Christmas. Therefore, these Festive Food Cupcake Cases are a definite Christmas essential!

7. Boots.com Henry Holland Unwrap Me False Nails £8.99  - I loved these false nails so much that I went out and bought them. Although I find false nails difficult because they get in the way of the simplest tasks, I made an exception with these Christmas themed Unwrap Me False Nails by Henry Holland. Unwrapping my Christmas presents with these false nails on might not be the easiest task but it's something that I am willing to master..

November / What's On My Wish Lists

I am currently powering through, typing this blog post with a severe case of jet lag....So, if you've been reading my blog posts for the past few months you will be aware that I was due to fly over to the USA late October - I did just that. On an eleven hour flight, I sat next to a stranger, trying to find every possible way to make time 'fly'. I have to say, after what was the longest plane journey of my life - both time-wise and distance, I finally arrived at LAX airport and had one of the best weeks of my life. LA was uh-maz-ing - from the weather to the friendly American people, my trip couldn't have been better. I will be doing a little blog post featuring some of my Duty free purchases and some little things I picked up over in the States some time soon so keep your eyes peeled!
For now, however, it is time for a classic 'What's On My Wish Lists' post for the new month of November! I am super excited that November has arrived because it means that Christmas is edging closer and closer...mince pies anyone? I couldn't resist and I've added in a few Christmassy themed items so if you're a Scrooge, turn a blind eye!

1. New Look Blue Vanilla Gold Lace Zip Black Sleeveless Top £22.00  - I think this top is the perfect top for Christmas. Its gold, lace detailing gives it the ultimate Christmas touch. You could dress this top down with a casual winter boot, a leather jacket and some leather-style leggings for a stylish but casual A/W outfit. Alternatively this top could be dressed up with the addition of gold bangle accessories, a pair of simple but delicate stiletto heels and depending on whether you want to achieve gothic glamour or red carpet-esque glamour, opt for a leather skirt (gothic glam) or a maxi skirt to achieve a dressy effect.

2. New Look Brown Gingerbread Man Clutch £12.99 - When I saw this Gingerbread Man Clutch I instantly fell in love. Not only would you be opting for a quirky, cute clutch to pair with your outfit but you'd also be carrying around a little friend under your arm! This clutch is bound to attract attention and for all the right reasons. I will 100% be purchasing this clutch after I've finished this post - who knows, maybe the little guy might even get a feature.

3.  H&M Boots £34.00 - These boots are classy and simple and are ideal if you want a casual outfit to have an extra edge. They would look to-die-for paired with ripped jeans and a biker jacket - edgy and classy!

4. Topshop Window Pane Check Sweat £34.00 - I have a massive obsession with jumpers. In fact, to be more specific, I have a massive obsession with Topshop jumpers. It's a problem, even more so because the jumpers are often £30+...goodbye money, hello fabulous jumper that I obviously need.

5. River Island Grey Faux Fur Woollen Biker Coat £90.00 - Coats. Living in the UK they are, without a doubt an essential item for any living organism. Therefore, I came to the conclusion when I feasted my eyes on this gorgeous, Grey Faux Fur Woollen Biker Coat that buying it would in fact be an investment. This investment would not only be a fashion investment but a health investment - who wants colds because you've been wearing crop tops all year? I want to wrap up and be cosy and warm with a cup of Starbucks coffee in one hand and a handbag draped across the other, not having to worry about catching a chill - this coat is the answer to my problems...

1. MAC Cosmetics Keepsakes Christmas Palette Biege Eyes £32.00 £28.00 - It's that time of year again when I start hunting for items to put on my Christmas list. I say 'hunt' as if these items are hard to find. In reality, I have far too many items to choose from to put on my Christmas list...call it materialism at its worst or wanting to look the best a girl possibly can - whatever it is, this Keepsakes Christmas Palette is probably the most awesome thing I am yet to see come out of a new MAC collection. I love the British, antique theme and finish to the palette, not to mention the beige spectrum of colours which are quite frankly gorgeous.

2. Essie Encrusted Collection Peak Of Chic £9.99 - Nail varnishes!! Another of my hoarding items that I seem to accumulate each year...can you ever have enough? I wear nail varnishes daily and what attracted me to this nail varnish, was of course, its Christmassy themed sparkle. Whether you just dust your nails with sparkles using it as a top coat, or smother your nails head-to-toe in an intensive sparkly coat - this nail varnish is a definite must-have for anyone with a hint of early Christmas spirit.

3. MAC Cosmetics Mineralize Christmas Brush Kit £42.00 £37.80 - Until last year, I had always applied my makeup using my hands. Reflecting on this, I really have no idea how I managed in life. In fact, it has now come to my attention that every person who wears even a hint of makeup should apply it with a gorgeous makeup brush. Makeup brushes give you a finish that no hands can achieve - smooth and glowing. Therefore - how can you ever have enough? I absolutely love these Christmassy brushes and they would definitely be an investment.

4. Viktor & Rolf Bonbob Eau De Parfum £84.15 - I smelt this perfume in LAX airport and literally fell in love. I've been using my staple perfume for nearly two years now and although it has become a bit of a signature scent of mine, I would love to find a companion perfume to wear on days that I want to smell a bit different. After just a couple of sprays, I knew I'd found my companion perfume..so...Dear Santa...

5. Bobbi Brown Vixen Red Lip Colour £19.80 - This year, my lipstick addiction has become far more controlled. I think I've collected about 5/6 lipsticks throughout the year, which, I think is very, very restrained. So, why not treat myself and stick a few lipsticks on my Christmas list? Perhaps it will be the trigger to re-starting my lipstick addiction, or perhaps it will mean that I am closer to completing my collection - it's a risk I'm willing to take. I love this Vixen Red Lip Colour by Bobbi Brown. I've got the Christmas theme nailed with 'Vixen' as its name and Red is of course the ultimate Christmas colour.

6. MAC Cosmetics Heirloom Mix Fluidline £17.00 £15.30 - Up until now I have been using a liquid liner. I have had no problems with my liquid liner, in fact, I'm quite accustomed to it, but when I saw this Heirloom Mix Fluidline, I was tempted to mix things up a little and give it a try.